The Joker

Question 1

Shrinking Clothes

All this time I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. It turns out it was the refrigerator!

Question 2

Psychiatrist Pun

This guy walks into a psychiatrist's office completely wrapped in cellophane. The doctor looks at the guy and says "well I can obviously see your nuts."

Question 3

Voltaire Quote

Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.

Question 4

Dracula's Favorite Breed Of Dog Joke

What dog breed would Dracula love to have as a pet?

Question 5

What Did Dracula Suffer From After Biting A Snowman Joke

What did Dracula suffer from after biting a snowman?

Question 6

Building With The Most Stories Joke

What building in your town has the most stories?

Question 7

Upolsterer

Great news everyone. Apparently that man who was shot 200 times with an upholstery gun... is now fully "recovered".

Question 8

What Do You Call Dracula When Hes Shopping For Bargains Joke

What do you call Dracula when he's shopping for bargains?

Question 9

Worm In An Apple Joke

What's worse than a worm in an apple?

Question 10

Monsters Favorite Play Joke

What's a monster's favorite play?

Question 11

A Parachutist Joke

A parachutist is falling towards earth and can't get his parachute to open. Surprisingly he sees a guy flying up from earth and yells over to him "hey do you know anything about parachutes?" the other guys respond "no, do you know anything about gas grills?!

Question 12

Middle Age Joke

How can you tell when you've reached middles age?

Question 13

Midwife Joke

Midwives deserve a lot of respect... They really help people out!

Question 14

Cannabis Farmers

Do cannabis farmers use weed killer?

Question 15

It's Illegal To Laugh Loudly In Hawaii Joke

Did you know that in Hawaii, it’s actually illegal to laugh loudly?

Question 16

No Eye Dear Joke

What do you call a deer with no eyes? ...no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? ....still no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs having sex? ...still fucking no eye deer.

Question 17

COVID-19

Cornona Virus, it's an inside joke.

Question 18

Human Intelligence

So somewhere out in space two alien life forms are talking with each other. The first one says "The dominant life forms on the planet earth have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons "The second one asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?" The first alien replies, " I don't think so. they have them aimed at themselves!".

Question 19

SERENITY

Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, "How old was your husband?" "98," she replied... "Two years older than me." "So you're 96," the undertaker commented. She responded, "Hardly worth going home, is it?"

Question 20

Mother Of Jesus Joke

Since Mary is the mother of Jesus and Jesus is the lamb of God... Does that mean Mary had a little lamb?

Question 21

Clear The Table Joke

My wife asked me to clear the dining table...I had to get a running start but I made it!

Question 22

The Long Drive

It was a sunny Saturday morning and Brian was beginning his pre-shot routine -- visualizing his upcoming shot -- when a voice came over the clubhouse loudspeaker: "Would the gentleman on the ladies tee back up to the men's tee, please!" Brian was still deep in his routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement: "Would the man on the women's tee kindly back up the men's tee!" Brian had had enough. He shouted, "Would the announcer in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot!"

Question 23

Apartments Joke

Why do they call them apartments when they are all stuck together?

Question 24

Tweety Bird Knock Knock Joke

Tweety: knock knock. Sylvester: Who's there? Tweety: Gladys. Sylvester: Gladys who? Tweety: Gladys you and not that awful puddy tat!

Question 25

Timing Is Everything Joke

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.

Question 26

Egg On The Barn Joke

What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn?

Question 27

Picking Berries

When Gathering Berries... You have to be picky!

Question 28

Santa’s Favorite Singer Joke

Who is Santa's favorite singer?

Question 29

Cremation

I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday.

Question 30

What's A Snake Favorite Subject Kids Joke

What's a snake favorite school subject?

The Joker

Shrinking Clothes

Psychiatrist Pun

Voltaire Quote

Dracula's Favorite Breed Of Dog Joke

What Did Dracula Suffer From After Biting A Snowman Joke

Building With The Most Stories Joke

Upolsterer

What Do You Call Dracula When Hes Shopping For Bargains Joke

Worm In An Apple Joke

Monsters Favorite Play Joke

A Parachutist Joke

Middle Age Joke

Midwife Joke

Cannabis Farmers

It's Illegal To Laugh Loudly In Hawaii Joke

No Eye Dear Joke

COVID-19

Human Intelligence

SERENITY

Mother Of Jesus Joke

Clear The Table Joke

The Long Drive

Apartments Joke

Tweety Bird Knock Knock Joke

Timing Is Everything Joke

Egg On The Barn Joke

Picking Berries

Santa’s Favorite Singer Joke

Cremation

What's A Snake Favorite Subject Kids Joke

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