This page is meant to help you find the funniest fart quotes. It includes Fart quotes for kids, teens and adults. With fart quotes, you often get crude and immature renditions. Save yourself time by reading the best collection of quotes.

Fart Quotes from famous people

  1. I still like farts. I still think farts are some of the funniest things. Thomas Middleditch
  2. Nothing makes me laugh more than farting. Kate McKinnon
  3. Fart jokes still work for me. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau
  4. A good fart joke makes me bawl with laughter, so will somebody farting. And the word 'poo.' You can't beat a good poo joke. Jenny Eclair
  5. Girls don't poop, so don't claim you do. You can fart - because farting is funny - but we don't want to know that you poop. Ryan Hansen
  6. I am happy everywhere except in places where I see glitz and rich farts. I am happiest in Brooklyn, where the concentration of rich farts is minimal. Nassim Nicholas Taleb
  7. My philosophy of dating is to just fart right away. Jenny McCarthy
  8. My trumpeting sounds like a goose farting in the fog. Alex O'Loughlin
  9. I burp, I fart. I'm a real woman. Kate Winslet
  10. 'Stans' can not see anything wrong with their favorite artist. They love everything they do. If the artist fart, they're like, 'OMG, that was the best-sounding fart I ever heard in my life. She farted on beat,' whatever. I'm an 'objective fan,' so I can give my opinion about things. Charlamagne tha God
  11. Jerry Ford is so dumb he can't fart and chew gum at the same time. Lyndon B. Johnson
  12. My two sons are the biggest pigs - always dirty, sweaty, burping and farting. Judy Gold
  13. There's nothing worse than a bunch of jaded old farts, and that's a fact. Robert Plant
  14. I'd like to think I'd never do a gratuitous fart joke. Harold Ramis
  15. Rock n' roll is for the young idiots, not an old fart like me. Al Jourgensen
  16. I can smell a liar like a fart in a lift! Robert Rinder
  17. If you let go of fart jokes, you've let go of a piece of humanity. Andy Samberg
  18. I couldn't fart in an elevator without people wanting to sue me. Tommy Morrison
  19. At my age, you sort of fart your way into a role. Donald Sutherland
  20. Verbal contracts are about as useful as a fart on a treadmill. Robert Rinder
  21. If you can fart in front of somebody, you know that they love you. Thundercat
  22. I think that everything starts to go to hell when you start smelling your own farts and complimenting yourself on how great they smell. We're not going to turn into fart-smellers. D. B. Weiss
  23. I'm too old to be farting around with stuff that isn't precisely what I want to do. Wes Borland
  24. I have no idea how to use social media for anything other than forwarding a good fart joke. Nia Vardalos
  25. Agriculture is one of the biggest causes of greenhouse gases in the atmosphere. Cars? Planes? Trains? Nope. Cow farts. Zazie Beetz
  26. I just find all that stuff incredibly funny. I love a fart. I'd do anything for a good poo story. Phoebe Waller-Bridge
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