418 DAD JOKES

Joke: What do you call a fly without wings?

Joke: Why did the elephant call the locksmith?

Joke: How do you get a mouse to smile?

Joke: What was the elephant doing on the highway?

Joke: A young boy asks his dad, "What is the difference between confident and confidential?" Dad says, "You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there is also my son; that's confidential!"

Joke: How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree?

Joke: A man scolded his son for being so unruly and the child rebelled against his father. He got some of his clothes, his teddy bear, and his piggy bank and proudly announced, "I'm running away from home!" The father calmly decided to look at the matter logically. "What if you get hungry?" he said. "Then I'll come home and eat!" bravely declared the child. "And what if you run out of money?" "I will come home and get some!" readily replied the child. The man then made a final attempt, "What if your clothes get dirty?" "Then I'll come home and let mommy wash them," was the reply. The man shook his head and exclaimed, "This kid is not running away from home, he's going off to college!"

Joke: What do you do when your nose goes on strike?

Joke: How many aerobics instructors does it take to change a lightbulb?

Joke: A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."