Last updated:

Computer Jokes

Sort Rating
Joke:

My computer doesn't understand me!

VOTE
Joke:

What type of storage units do underwater computers use?

Punchline
VOTE
Joke:

How many Unix hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

Punchline
VOTE
Joke:

How did the computer die?

Punchline
VOTE
Joke:

A man called the computer company technical support because he was having trouble with his computer. A woman answered the phone. "Hello. May I help you?" "Yes. I'm having trouble with my computer. Every time I press the enter key my computer goes biserk." "I think I know what you should do." "Really?" "Yes." "What should I do?" "You should stop pressing the enter key."

VOTE
Joke:

If anyone gets a message from me about canned meat don’t open it... It's Spam!

VOTE
Joke:

Last night my kids and I were sitting in the living room and I said to them, "I never want to live in a vegetive state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." They got up, unplugged my computer and threw away my wine! The little ingrates.

VOTE
Joke:

Apparently you can't use "Beefstew" as a password... It's not stroganoff.

VOTE
Joke:

A memory was something you lost with age. An application was for employment. A program was a TV show. A cursor used profanity. A keyboard was a piano. A web was a spider home. A virus was the flu. A cd was a bank account. A hard drive was a long trip on the road. A mouse pad was where a mouse lived. And if you had a 3 1/2" floppy... you just hoped nobody found out.

VOTE
Joke:

How many software people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Punchline
VOTE
Joke:

A woman in Wisconsin texted her husband early one morning, "Windows Frozen". Husband texted back, "Gently pour lukewarm water on windows". Later wife texted back, "Computer REALLY messed up now".

VOTE
Joke:

What do you call a computer hero?

Punchline
VOTE