What Do Get When You Cross A Shark With A Skunk?
Why Did The Chicken Cross Joke
Minister Without Suitcase
What Did One Cat Say To The Other Cat On The Phone
How Do You Get A Mouse To Smile
Why Did The Elephant Call The Locksmith
Have You Heard Of The Dyslexic Cow Who Attained Enlightenment
Why Does An Elephant Have A Trunk
A Guy Walks Into A Pet Shop...
Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils
What Animal Talks The Most
What Do You Call A Fly Without Wings
What Happens When You Cross A Bulldog With A Shih Tzu
What Do You Get When You Cross A Kangaroo And A Sheep
What Do You Get When You Cross A Snake And A Kangaroo
Carrots Are Good For Your Eyesight
How Do You Keep A Rhino From Charging
What Do You Call A Blind Deer
Yo Momma Is As Fat As A Planet
Mental Health Hotline
Joke: Hello, and welcome to the Mental Health Hotline. If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7, and your call will be transferred to the mother ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press-no-one will answer. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969. If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the hash key until a representative comes on the line. If you have amnesia press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name. If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 000. If you have bipolar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All our operators are too busy to talk to you.
Punch Line
Yo Mama Is So Fat She Can Sell Shade
There Have Been Recent Terrorist Activities In France
Poor Boy Johnny
Joke: Little Johnny's teacher was giving a lesson on the importance of learning from mistakes. She asked the class, "Can anyone give me an example of a mistake they learned from?" Little Johnny eagerly raised his hand. "I can, teacher!" "Okay, Johnny, please share your example." Johnny stood up and confidently began, "Last week, I was playing in the living room and my dad was watching a football game. I asked him where the remote was, and he told me it was next to the phone. So I went and picked up the phone, but I couldn't find the remote anywhere." The teacher, puzzled, asked, "So what was the mistake, Johnny?" Johnny grinned, "Well, it turns out my dad said 'phone', but what he actually meant was 'next to the couch'. I learned that sometimes parents don't say what they mean, and next time, I'll just look around more carefully!" The teacher laughed and said, "That's an interesting lesson, Johnny. But next time, try listening more carefully too!" Johnny nodded, "Sure, teacher. Or maybe I'll just keep the remote with me!"
A Lamp A Genie And Guinness Beer
Joke: Two Irishmen, Patrick & Michael, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a burning ship. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, Patrick stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of Patrick, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three. Without giving much thought to the matter, Patrick blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into Guinness Beer!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals. Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of Guinness on the hull broke the stillness as the two men considered their circumstances. Michael looked disgustedly at Patrick whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension-filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going Patrick! Now we're going to have to pee in the boat!"
What Do You Call A Holy Man Who Fries Potatoes
Somewhere In The Deep South...
A Teacher Asks Her Students If They're Yankees Fans.
Why Do Santa's Helpers Get Depressed
What Do They Sing To Christmas Trees At The Retirement Parties
What Do You Call A Broke Santa Claus
Where Did Your Sister Go Hunting
Why Was The Belt Arrested
What Do You Do When Your Nose Goes On Strike
Why Did The Blonde Jump Off The Bridge
There Is Only One Thing I Can't Deal With Joke
Scarecrow Joke (In Prep For Fall)
Princess Leia Shopping Joke
Star Wars Restauant Workers Joke
Potato Turned To The Dark Side Joke
Sith Who Won't Fight Joke
Secrets Of The Galactic Empire Joke
What Do You Call A Book Club That’s Been Stuck On The Same Book For Years?
Yo Mama So Fat Jenny Craig Joke
A Funny Joke (about A Rat)
What Do You Call A Rat Crossing The Road?
This One Makes You Think...
Why Do Rats Suck At Taking Pictures?
A Church Has A Rat Problem
Why Was Dracula Afraid Of Cows Joke
What Do You Call Dracula When Hes Shopping For Bargains Joke
Where Does Dracula Get His Hair Cut Joke
Whats Draculas Favorite Streaming Service Joke