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Musician Jokes

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Joke: What happens when you put a pig in a musical?
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Joke: Did you hear that Jon Bon Jovi is on a strict fruit diet?
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Joke: What do you call a musician with real high morals?
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Joke: What do you call a group of armpit farters?
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Joke: My friend Joe recently went on the Dolly Parton diet.... It really made Joe lean, Joe lean, Joe Lean, Joe leannnnn!
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Joke: You know how you can tell when there is a pilot in a room?
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Joke: Why was the piano locked out of the house?
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Joke: A musician who joined an orchestra on a cruise ship was having difficulty keeping time with the rest of the band. Finally, the captain said, "Either you learn to keep time or I'll throw you overboard. . . . It's up to you, sync or swim."
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Joke: Why did Beethoven get rid of all his chickens?
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Joke: Hey, did you hear about the experiment where they blessed the rains down in Africa?
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Joke: Two windmills are in a field. One asks, "What kind of music do you like?" The other one says, "Well, I'm a big metal fan."
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Joke: My friend composes songs about sewing machines. He's a Singer songwriter or sew it seams.
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Joke: What did 50 Cent do when he was hungry?
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Joke: Never let anyone tell you what you can or cannot do. Just look at Beethoven. Everyone told him he would never be a musician, just because he was deaf. But, did he listen?
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Joke: Did you hear about the orchestra that got electrocuted?
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Joke: Pat is at the airport with a sack over each shoulder. When he is stopped at customs they fin that both sacks are full of mobile phones. When asked why Pat said, "Well, while I was on my travels in America, I got a phone call from my mate Mick and he told me he was starting a Jazz band and could I bring him two saxophones."
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Joke: A woman is on trial for beating her husband with his guitars. The judge asks her, "first offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender."
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Joke: What type of music are balloons afraid of?
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Joke: My friend is changing his bands name to 999 Megabytes because they never got a gig.
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Joke: I hate when I'm singing along to a song and the artist gets the lyrics wrong...
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Joke: Did you hear about the constipated composer?
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