Animal Jokes

Rating

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell gas station!

VOTE
SHARE

Did you hear the one about the Polish wolf?

He chewed off three legs and was still caught in the trap.

VOTE
SHARE

What's black and white and makes a lot of noise?

A zebra with a drum.

VOTE
SHARE

What do you call Pegasus farts?

Horse power.

VOTE
SHARE

A man went camping in the woods by himself. He awoke early in the morning to hear a strange growling sound. He looked out to see a bear. He immediately began to run as fast as he could. The bear was gaining on him and he finally gave up hope, fell on his knees and said "Oh God, please let this be a Christian bear! "He turned to see the bear on his knees saying "Lord bless this food I am about to recieve..."

VOTE
SHARE

A priest, a minister and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says I think I might be a type O!

VOTE
SHARE

What is it called when a prairie dog sees its shadow?

Total Eclipse of a fart.

VOTE
SHARE

Why does the bass fart a half-tone flatter than every other fish? He's got a **b** in front of his ass

VOTE
SHARE

Why do cows wear bells?

In case their horns don't work.

VOTE
SHARE

What do you call a cow jumping over a barbed wire fence?

Utter destruction.

VOTE
SHARE