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What is a snake's favorite subject?
Hissssss-tory.
Two children ordered their mother to stay in bed one Mother's Day morning. As the smell of bacon floated up from the kitchen, she lay in eager anticipation of the lovely breakfast her helpful, caring children were making for her. However, after a good long wait, she finally went downstairs to investigate. She found them both sitting at the table eating bacon and eggs. "As a surprise for Mother's Day," one explained, "we decided to cook our own breakfast."
How do Ewoks communicate over long distances?
With Ewokie Talkies.
Where does Princess Leia go clothes shopping?
At the Darth Maul.
Which Star Wars characters work at a restaurant?
Darth Waiter and Luke Dishwasher.
What do you call a potato that has turned to the Dark Side?
Vader Tots.
What do you call a Sith who won't fight?
A Sithy!
What do you call the website that divulges the secrets of the Galactic Empire?
Wookieeleaks.
Why did the Jedi cross the road?
To get to the Dark Side.
What do you call a book club that’s been stuck on the same book for years?
Church.
A man asked his wife what she would do it he won the lottery. She said, "I would take half the money and leave you!" "Great!", he said. "I won $12, here's $6. Stay in touch."
Yo mama's so fat she went to Jenny Craig and the only thing she lost was $19.99
Went to a new restaurant the other day and tried the Wookiee steak... It was chewy.
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