The Joker

Question 1

Weight Loss Scam Joke

I want to lose weight but I don't want to get caught up in one of those "eat right and exercise" scams.

Question 2

Easter Bunny Tail Joke

Where does the Easter Bunny go for new tails?

Question 3

Good In Bed Joke

I'm actually pretty good in bed. I hardly ever fall out anymore.

Question 4

Windmill Music Joke

Two windmills are in a field. One asks, "What kind of music do you like?" The other one says, "Well, I'm a big metal fan."

Question 5

Don't Drink Gas Joke.

Who can drink 5 gallons of gas without getting sick?

Question 6

You Just Know

Sometimes you meet someone and you know from the first moment that you want to spend the rest of your life without them!

Question 7

Safe Sex Joke

Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot and killed by the woman’s husband.

Question 8

Testicle Joke

"Well, Mr. Brown." Says the doctor. "I have just discovered that you have one testicle made of wood and one testicle made of steel." "But that's impossible." Says Mr. Brown. "I've never had any operations and apart from that I have two perfectly healthy children." "How old are your children?" "Well, Pinocchio is 6 and Terminator is 7."

Question 9

Kid At A Funeral Joke

When I was about 7 years old, my mom forced me to go with her to the funeral of a friend of hers that I didn't know. When we got there, I stayed in a corner waiting for the funeral to end. Then a man approached me and said: "Enjoy life, boy. Be happy because time flies. Look at me now, I didn't enjoy mine." He patted my head and left. Before leaving, my mom forced me to say goodbye to the dead person. When I looked in the coffin, I was startled to see the man who was talking to me in the corner was the same one in the coffin. For several years, I was not able to sleep properly because of nightmares. Years later, I discovered that the dead man had a twin brother.

Question 10

Anti-clockwise Watch

The wicked witch from the south watches the watch that’s turning anti-clockwise, so now everyone knows now which witch watches what watch.

Question 11

Why Are There Pop-tarts But No Mom-tarts?

Why are there Pop-tarts but no Mom-tarts?

Question 12

Why Does A Lion Kneel Before It Springs?

Why does a lion kneel before it springs?

Question 13

Kids Cowboy Boots

The teacher was helping one of her kindergarten students put on his cowboy boots. He asked for help and she could see why. Even with her pulling and him pushing, the little boots still didn't want to go on. Finally, when the second boot was on, she had worked up a sweat. She almost cried when the little boy said, "Teacher, they're on the wrong feet." She looked and sure enough, they were. It wasn't any easier pulling the boots off than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as together they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the right feet. He then announced, "These aren't my boots." She bit her tongue rather than get right in his face and scream, "Why didn't you say so?" like she wanted to. And once again she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet. No sooner than they got the boots off he said, "They're my brother's boots. My Mom made me wear 'em." Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry, but she mustered up the grace and courage she had left to wrestle the boots on his feet again. Helping him into his coat, she asked, "Now, where are your mittens?" He said, "I stuffed 'em in the toes of my boots."