The Joker

Question 1

Wife's Driving Test Joke

My wife had her driving test today. She got eight out of ten. The other two jumped out of the way!

Question 2

Golden Rule

My mother always told me if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all... And some people wonder why I'm so quiet around them!

Question 3

Qanon Shaman Joke

What did Qanon Shaman's mom say to him when he was on his way to jail? Bison.

Question 4

How Many Feet In A Yard Joke

How many feet in a yard?

Question 5

The Silent Treatment Joke

Wife: I'm not talking to you! Husband: OK. Wife: Don't you want to know the reason? Husband: No, I respect and trust your decision.

Question 6

Comic Sans Joke

Comic sans implies the existence of tragic sans.

Question 7

Treadmill Joke

I just saw some idiot at the gym put a water bottle in the Pringles holder on the treadmill.

Question 8

Lettuce Pun

Lettuce come together. Romaine Calm. This may be just the tip of the iceberg.

Question 9

True Love Always

Ladies, if he is... is hot, always smells good, makes your mouth water, tastes amazing, leaves you feeling happier than ever... That's not your man. That's a taco!

Question 10

Bigger Boobies

A flat-chested young lady went to Dr. Smith about enlarging her tiny breasts. Dr. Smith advised her, "Every day after your shower rub your chest and say, "Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies." She did this faithfully for several months and it worked! She grew terrific D-cup boobs! One morning she was running late, got on the bus, and in a panic realized she had forgotten her morning ritual. Frightened she might lose her lovely boobs if she didn't recite the little rhyme, she stood right there in the middle aisle of the bus closed her eyes, and said, "Scooby doobie doobies, I want bigger boobies." Little Johnny sitting nearby looked at her, "By any chance, are you a patient of Dr. Smith's?" "Why, yes I am... How did you know?" He leaned closer, winked, and whispered, "Hickory Dickory Dock..."

Question 11

How Late Do Cows Stay Up Joke

How late do cows stay up?

Question 12

What Did One Llama Say To The Other Llama?

What did one llama say to the other llama?

Question 13

Blonde Without Electricity Joke.

A blonde thinking to herself, "If it wasn't for the man who discovered electricity, we'd all be watching TV by candlelight."

Question 14

Kleptomania Joke

I've been diagnosed with Kleptomania... but I'm taking something for it!

Question 15

You Don't Listen

My wife just stopped and said, "You weren't listening were you?" I thought, "That's a pretty weird way to start a conversation."

Question 16

I Respect Giraffe’s Joke

I respect giraffe’s... They’re an animal I can look up to.

Question 17

Sick Wooden Box Joke

How do you know if a wooden box is sick?

Question 18

Halloween Ghost Favorite Food Joke

What's a ghosts favorite food?

Question 19

Two Eggs Boiling In A Pot Joke.

Two eggs are boiling in a pot. One egg says to the other, "I've got a huge crack". The other egg replies, "Stop teasing me, I'm not even hard yet!"

Question 20

Ghost Vacation Joke

Where do ghost's go on vacation?

Question 21

Hamburger Gym Joke

Why did the hamburger go to the gym?

Question 22

Noisy Graveyard Joke

Why are graveyards so noisy?

Question 23

Calm Skeleton Joke

Why are skeletons so calm?

Question 24

Vampire Breath Joke

Why do vampires need mouthwash?

Question 25

Nair Hair Removal Warnings!

This lady found out her dog could hardly hear so she took it to the veterinarian. He found that the problem was hair in its ears. He cleaned both ears and the dog could hear fine. The vet then proceeded to tell the lady that if she wanted to keep this from recurring she should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month. The lady goes to the drug store and gets some "Nair" hair remover. At the register, the druggist tells her, "If you’re going to use this under your arms don't use deodorant for a few days." The lady says: "I'm not using it under my arms." The druggist says: "If you're using it on your legs don’t shave for a couple of days." The lady says: "I’m not using it on my legs either; if you must know, I'm using it on my schnauzer.." The druggist says: "Stay off your bicycle for at least a week."

Question 26

Joined A Gym

It's been six months since I joined the gym and still no progress. I'm going there tomorrow to find out what's going on.

Question 27

National Holiday For A Nation Of Vampires Jokes

What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires?

Question 28

Sitting Alone On A Bench Joke

Whenever I'm sitting on a bench all by myself and someone I don't know sits beside me I just look straight forward and ask, "Did you bring the money?"

Question 29

Cow Poker

A couple of cows were smoking a joint and playing cards... The steaks were pretty high.

Question 30

Ghost Vacation Destination Joke

Where do ghosts like to travel on vacation?

The Joker

Wife's Driving Test Joke

Golden Rule

Qanon Shaman Joke

How Many Feet In A Yard Joke

The Silent Treatment Joke

Comic Sans Joke

Treadmill Joke

Lettuce Pun

True Love Always

Bigger Boobies

How Late Do Cows Stay Up Joke

What Did One Llama Say To The Other Llama?

Blonde Without Electricity Joke.

Kleptomania Joke

You Don't Listen

I Respect Giraffe’s Joke

Sick Wooden Box Joke

Halloween Ghost Favorite Food Joke

Two Eggs Boiling In A Pot Joke.

Ghost Vacation Joke

Hamburger Gym Joke

Noisy Graveyard Joke

Calm Skeleton Joke

Vampire Breath Joke

Nair Hair Removal Warnings!

Joined A Gym

National Holiday For A Nation Of Vampires Jokes

Sitting Alone On A Bench Joke

Cow Poker

Ghost Vacation Destination Joke

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