The Joker

Question 1

Trees Surfing The Internet

How do trees access the internet?

Question 2

Knock Knock Pun

Did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke? He won the 'no-bell' prize.

Question 3

Halloween Skeleton Joke

How much does a skeleton weigh?

Question 4

Blonde X-Ray

Doctor, "I'm just waiting for your x-ray." Blonde, "But I never dated anyone named Ray." Doctor, "And we might do a brain scan."

Question 5

Dart Board

My brother mounted a dartboard on the ceiling of his man cave. This made me throw up.

Question 6

Horoscope Joke

My wife left me because of my obsession with horoscopes...it Taurus apart.

Question 7

My Living Will

Last night my kids and I were sitting in the living room and I said to them, "I never want to live in a vegetive state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." They got up, unplugged my computer and threw away my wine! The little ingrates.

Question 8

Octopus Laugh Joke

How do you make an octopus laugh?

Question 9

Alien In Garden Joke

What did the alien in the garden say?

Question 10

How To Become A Millionaire

Hugh Hefner became a multi-millionaire staying home in his pajamas. I'm not having the same results.

Question 11

King Pencil Joke

Who's the king of the pencil case?

Question 12

Career Choices

As I get older and I remember all the people I've lost along the way, I think to myself, maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for me.

Question 13

Dad Bod Joke

Hey, that's not a dad bod... It's a father figure!

Question 14

Use Vodka To Clean House

Someone sent me an email about using vodka for cleaning around the house... it worked! The more vodka I drank, the cleaner the house looked.

Question 15

Bra Joke

The biggest bra made for horses... Is the Z-bra!

Question 16

Dwarf Prisoner Joke

I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall!

Question 17

Quiet Mind

My mind is exceptionally quiet... I'm suspicious that I'm up to something I don't want myself to know about.

Question 18

Strong Mountain Joke

Why can't a mountain get stronger?

Question 19

You Will Walk Today Joke

I went to church today and the preacher came over to me and said, "You will walk today." I told him I wasn't paralyzed, but he said it again with more enthusiasm. After the service, I went outside and my car was gone!

Question 20

Psychiatrist To Me I Had A Split Personality

I went to the psychiatrist today. She told me I have a split personality and charged me $160.

Question 21

Chemistry Joke

I like to tell chemistry jokes, but I never get a good reaction.

Question 22

How Many Flies Joke

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only two, but don't ask me how they got in there.

Question 23

Four Leaf Clover Joke

What do you get when you cross a four-leaf clover with poison ivy?

Question 24

Mickey And Minne Mouse Divorce

I understand that Mickey and Minne Mouse are getting a divorce. When the judge asked Mickey why he wants to divorce Minnie and he merely replied..."she's f*cking goofy"

Question 25

Smal Valentine Joke

What do you call a small Valentine?

Question 26

Three Men Die In A Car Crash Joke

After dying in a car crash, three friends went to Heaven for an orientation session. They were all asked the same question: When you were in your casket and your family and friends were mourning over you, what would you like to hear when they talk about you? The first guy responded: "I would like to hear them say that I was one of the greatest doctors of my time and a great family man." The second guy said: "I would love to hear that I was a wonderful husband and a school teacher who made a huge difference in the children of tomorrow" Then the third guy thought for a while and then replied: "I guess I'd like to hear them say: 'Look.. he's moving"

Question 27

Dancers Change A Light Bulb Joke

How many dancers does it take to change a light bulb?

Question 28

Other Side Of The Lake Joke

Standing on the edge of the lake, someone shouted across "How do you get to the other side?"

Question 29

Stand In The Corner If You Get Cold Joke

Why should you stand in the corner if you get cold?

Question 30

Used Grapes Jokes

If you advertise used grapes... Is that raisin awareness?

The Joker

Trees Surfing The Internet

Knock Knock Pun

Halloween Skeleton Joke

Blonde X-Ray

Dart Board

Horoscope Joke

My Living Will

Octopus Laugh Joke

Alien In Garden Joke

How To Become A Millionaire

King Pencil Joke

Career Choices

Dad Bod Joke

Use Vodka To Clean House

Bra Joke

Dwarf Prisoner Joke

Quiet Mind

Strong Mountain Joke

You Will Walk Today Joke

Psychiatrist To Me I Had A Split Personality

Chemistry Joke

How Many Flies Joke

Four Leaf Clover Joke

Mickey And Minne Mouse Divorce

Smal Valentine Joke

Three Men Die In A Car Crash Joke

Dancers Change A Light Bulb Joke

Other Side Of The Lake Joke

Stand In The Corner If You Get Cold Joke

Used Grapes Jokes

Joke Categories

SHARE THIS?

Newsletter

Contributors