The Joker

Question 1

Women Have Small Feet

Why do women have small feet?

Question 2

Comedic Dreams

Always wanted to be a comedian but everyone just laughed at me!

Question 3

4th Of July Duck Joke

What do you call a duck on the 4th of July?

Question 4

Baby Shark Joke

Why do sharks swim in salt water?

Question 5

Unbelievable

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

Question 6

Tiny Surfer Joke

What kind of wave do tiny surfers ride?

Question 7

Strip Down Joke

The cashier told me, "Strip down facing me". By the time I realized they meant the debit card, it was too late.

Question 8

A Blondes Dogs

A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that now was named Rolex and the other one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming their dogs like that?" "Helloooooo...," answered the blonde. "They're watch dogs!"

Question 9

Exorcist Joke

If you don't pay your exorcist do you get repossessed?

Question 10

Horny Talking Frog Joke

What does a horny frog say?

Question 11

Chickpea Joke

What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?

Question 12

Not Scared Of The Devil

The devil shows up in a church and everyone runs out but an old man. The devil says, "Why don't you run, aren't you afraid of me?" The old man replies, "Nope, I'm married to your sister!"

Question 13

Don't Correct A Fool

Do not correct a fool or he will hate you. Correct a wise man and he will appreciate you.

Question 14

Coming Home From Business Trip Joke

A mother-in-law arrives home from the mall to find her son-in-law boiling angry and hurriedly packing his suitcase. "What happened?", she asks anxiously. "What happened! I'll tell you what happened. I sent an email to my wife telling her I was coming home today from my business trip. I get home, and guess what I found? Yes, your daughter, my wife, with a guy in our bed! This is unforgivable, the end of our marriage. I'm done. I'm leaving forever!" "Calm down, calm down!" says his mother-in-law. "There is something very odd going on here. My daughter would never do such a thing! There must be a simple explanation. I'll go speak to her immediately and find out what happened." Moments later, the mother-in-law comes back with a big smile. "I told you there must be a simple explanation... she didn't get the email."

Question 15

Easter Egg Joke

Easter egg hunts are proof kids can find things if they really want to.

Question 16

Throwing Rice Pun

Me & my mates were at an Indian restaurant & some guys started throwing rice at us. So we threw rice back at them....We had a pilau fight.

Question 17

Why Do Ilegal Immigrants Like Climate Change Joke

Why do illegal immigrants like climate change?

Question 18

Two Ways To Argue...

There are two ways to argue with a woman... Neither one of them works.

Question 19

Highlighter Joke

I'm going to start collecting highlighters... mark my words!

Question 20

Two Little People Walk Into A Mini Bar Joke

Two little people walk into a mini bar...

Question 21

A Farmers Daughter Joke

A farmer drove to his neighbor's house and knocked on the door. A boy, about 9, opened the door. "Is your dad home?", asked the farmer. "No, they went to town.", the boy answered. How about your brother, Howard? asked the farmer. "No, he went to town with mom and dad.", answered the boy. The farmer stood there for a few minutes, shifting from one foot to the other, mumbling to himself, when the young boy said, "I know where all the tools are if you want to borrow one, or I can give dad a message." "Well", said the farmer uncomfortably. "No, I really want to talk to your dad about your brother Howard getting my daughter pregnant." The boy thought for a moment, then said, "You'll have to talk to my dad about that. I know he charged $500 for bulls and $150 for pigs, but I have no idea how much he charges for Howard."

Question 22

Is Your Mom Home?

A salesman was going door to door trying to sell his wares. As he walked up to the next house, he noticed a small boy sitting on the front steps. "Is your mother home?" the salesman asked the small boy. "Yeah, she's home," the boy said, scooting over to let him past. The salesman rang the doorbell, got no response, knocked once, then again. Still, no one came to the door. Turning to the boy, the fellow said, "I thought you said your mother was home?!" The kid replied, "She is, but this isn't where I live."

Question 23

Get Thinner Joke

I went to the paint store to get thinner. It didn't work!

Question 24

Nursing Home Joke

Three men were discussing aging at the nursing home. Sixty is the worst age to be," said the 60- year-old. You always feel like you have to pee. And most of the time, you stand at the toilet and nothing comes out!" "Ah, that's nothin'," said the 70-year-old. When you're seventy, you don't have a bowel movement anymore. You take laxatives, eat bran, you sit on the toilet all day and nothin’ comes out!" "Actually," said the 80-year-old, "Eighty is the worst age of all." "Do you have trouble peeing too?" asked the 60-year-old. "No, not really. I pee every morning at 6:00. I pee like a racehorse on a flat rock; no problem at all." "Do you have trouble having a bowel movement?" "No, I have one every morning at 6:30." With great exasperation, the 60-year-old said, "Let me get this straight. You pee every morning at 6:00 and poop every morning at 6:30. So what’s so tough about being 80?" "I don't wake up until 7:00."

Question 25

Beefstew Password

Apparently you can't use "Beefstew" as a password... It's not stroganoff.

Question 26

Which Witch Watch Halloween Joke

If two witches watched two watches, which witch would watch which watch?

Question 27

Marriage And Math Joke

A wife finds a note from her husband on the fridge one morning. My dear wife. You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you being 57 years old can no longer satisfy am very happy with you and I value you as a good wife. Therefore after reading this letter I hope that you will not wrongfully interpret the fact that l will be spending the evening with my 19-year-old secretary at the comfort inn hotel. Please don’t be upset-l shall be home before midnight. When the man came home late that night he found the following note on the dining table. My dear husband I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about me being 57 years old I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are also 57 years old As you know am a math teacher at our local college I would like to inform you that while you read this l will be at the Hotel Fiesta with Michael one of my students who is also the assistant tennis coach. He is young virile and like your secretary is 19 years old. As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will understand that we are in the same situation although with one small difference 19 goes into 57 more times than 57 goes into 19. Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow.

Question 28

Grandma On Speed Dial

I put grandma on speed dial and now I have Insta-Gram!

Question 29

Hotel Restaurant Joke

At a hotel restaurant, a man sees an attractive woman sitting alone at the next table. Suddenly, she sneezes, and a glass eye comes flying out of her eye socket. It hurls by the man and he snatches it from the air and hands it back to her. "This is so embarrassing." the woman says, and she popped her eye back in place. "I'm sorry to have disturbed you. Let me buy you dinner to make it up to you. May I join you?" He nods. The woman is a stimulating conversationalist, stunningly pretty, and the man finds they have a lot in common. He gets her phone number and asks, "You are the most charming women I've ever encountered. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?" "No," she replies. "You just happened to catch my eye."

Question 30

Diabetic Blonde

What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine?

The Joker

Women Have Small Feet

Comedic Dreams

4th Of July Duck Joke

Baby Shark Joke

Unbelievable

Tiny Surfer Joke

Strip Down Joke

A Blondes Dogs

Exorcist Joke

Horny Talking Frog Joke

Chickpea Joke

Not Scared Of The Devil

Don't Correct A Fool

Coming Home From Business Trip Joke

Easter Egg Joke

Throwing Rice Pun

Why Do Ilegal Immigrants Like Climate Change Joke

Two Ways To Argue...

Highlighter Joke

Two Little People Walk Into A Mini Bar Joke

A Farmers Daughter Joke

Is Your Mom Home?

Get Thinner Joke

Nursing Home Joke

Beefstew Password

Which Witch Watch Halloween Joke

Marriage And Math Joke

Grandma On Speed Dial

Hotel Restaurant Joke

Diabetic Blonde

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