The Joker

Question 1

My Name Is Lance Pun

Lance is a common name these days, but in medieval times, people were named Lance a lot.

Question 2

Strawberries

A neighbor suggested I put manure on my strawberries. Tasted horrible! I'm sticking with whipped cream!

Question 3

Canary Island Joke

Did you know there are no canaries on the Canary Islands? Same as with the Virgin Islands... No canaries there either.

Question 4

Butt Kisser Brown Nose Difference Joke

What's the difference between a butt kisser and a brown noser?

Question 5

IKEA Was Appointed Prime Minister Of Sweden Joke

Just read the CEO of IKEA was appointed Prime Minister of Sweden. He's currently assembling his cabinet.

Question 6

Astronaut’s Favorite Part Of A Computer

What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of a computer?

Question 7

Beaver Pun

What did the beaver say when he swam into a wall? DAM!

Question 8

How Much Does A Pirate Pay For Corn Joke

How much does a pirate pay for corn?

Question 9

Falling Autumn Leaves

It's autumn. My wife asked me why I won't rake the leaves?. I said, "It's because they're called leaves. If they were called pick-me-ups I would pick them up, but they're called leaves so I leave them."

Question 10

Frozen Turkey's Joke

So, I was at Walmart earlier. A lady was looking at the frozen turkeys, but she couldn't find one big enough. She asked the stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" He replies with a straight face, "No ma'am, they're dead."

Question 11

COVID-19 Vacation

This is the first year I'm not going to Fiji due to COVID-19. I usually don't go because I'm poor!

Question 12

ABC Joke

Ate two cans of Alphabet Soup. Had a terrible vowel movement.

Question 13

Ran Out Of Toilet Paper Joke

Ran out of toilet paper today and now using lettuce. Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be seen.

Question 14

A Blond's Password

So this guy asked his blond girlfriend what was her password and she told him it was "mickeyminniedonaldgoofyhueydueylouieplutohonolulu". When he asked her why she had such a long password she just rolled her eyes and said "hello! it does have to be at least eight characters and include a capital too!"

Question 15

Quarantine's Over

When quarantine is over, let's not tell some people.

Question 16

IDK Joke

My uncle asked me what does IDK mean? I said, "I Don't Know". He said, "Damn, nobody does!"

Question 17

Money Grows On Trees Joke

If money doesn't grow on trees, then why do banks have branches?

Question 18

Invention Of 0 Joke

To the person who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Question 19

Essential Oils

To me, essential oils are what drips out of a taco.

Question 20

Hat Pun

What did one hat say to the other hat?

Question 21

Missing Cake

My wife bought a Christmas cake last week and now we can't find it. I think it was stollen.

Question 22

T-Rex Joke

I buy all my weapons from a guy named T-REX... He's a small arms dealer!

Question 23

A Trip To The Store With Grandpa

I was behind a grandfather and his badly-behaved grandson. He has his hands full with the child screaming for lollies, biscuits, all sorts of things. The granddad is saying in a controlled voice: "Easy, William, we won't be long . . . easy boy." Another outburst and I heard the granddad calmly say: "It's okay William. Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there, boy." At the checkout, the little horror is throwing items out of the trolley. Granddad says again in a controlled voice: "William, William, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes, stay cool William." Well, I was really impressed, and when I got outside I saw the grandfather loading his groceries and the boy into the car. I walked over and said to the Grandad "Its none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. That whole time you kept your composure, and no matter how loud and disruptive he got, you just calmly kept saying things would be okay. William is very lucky to have you as his granddad." "Thanks," said the Granddad. "But I am William. That little a-hole's name is Kevin!

Question 24

Farmer Needs New Cows

How does a farmer find new cows to buy?

Question 25

Locked Out Of The House

If you ever get locked out of your house, talk to the lock calmly. Because communication is key.

Question 26

A Wise Man Joke

In life, it is very important to know when to stop arguing with people and just let them be wrong!

Question 27

My Earliest Childhood Memory Joke

My earliest childhood memory was getting my first pair of glasses... Life before that was a blur.

Question 28

Bank Job

I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A women asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Question 29

Eight Hour Day

Sometimes it takes me eight hours to get nothing done.

Question 30

Buttcheeks Joke

Is "Buttcheeks" one word?

The Joker

My Name Is Lance Pun

Strawberries

Canary Island Joke

Butt Kisser Brown Nose Difference Joke

IKEA Was Appointed Prime Minister Of Sweden Joke

Astronaut’s Favorite Part Of A Computer

Beaver Pun

How Much Does A Pirate Pay For Corn Joke

Falling Autumn Leaves

Frozen Turkey's Joke

COVID-19 Vacation

ABC Joke

Ran Out Of Toilet Paper Joke

A Blond's Password

Quarantine's Over

IDK Joke

Money Grows On Trees Joke

Invention Of 0 Joke

Essential Oils

Hat Pun

Missing Cake

T-Rex Joke

A Trip To The Store With Grandpa

Farmer Needs New Cows

Locked Out Of The House

A Wise Man Joke

My Earliest Childhood Memory Joke

Bank Job

Eight Hour Day

Buttcheeks Joke

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