The Joker

Question 1

Birds And Bees Joke

I feel bad for parents nowadays. You have to be able to explain the birds and the bees... The bees & the bees... The birds and the birds... The birds that used to be bees... The bees that used to be birds... The birds that look like bees... Plus bees that look like birds but still got a stinger!

Question 2

Poop Joke

Poop jokes aren't my favorite kind of jokes, but they are a solid number two.

Question 3

Beautifiers

A husband and wife are at the grocery store. The husband picks up a case of beer and puts it in the cart. The wife asks, "What are you doing?" He says, "The beer is on sale, 24 cans for $10." She says, "We can't afford that so put it back!" A few isles later the wife puts a $20 tube of face cream in the cart. The husband asks, "What is that for?" The wife says, "It makes my face pretty." The husband replies, "So does 24 cans of beer and it's half the price!"

Question 4

Two Dogs And A Cat Go To Heaven Joke

A German Shepherd, a Doberman and a cat died. In heaven, all three faced God, who wanted to know what they believed in. The German Shepherd said, "I believe in discipline, training and loyalty to my master." "Good!" said God. "Sit at my right side." "Doberman, what do you believe in?" asked God. The doberman answered, "I believe in the love, care and protection of my master." "Aha," said God. "You may sit to my left." Then God looked at the cat and asked "And what do you believe in?" The cat replied, "I believe you're sitting in my seat."

Question 5

When It Rains

When it rains do tall people get wet first?

Question 6

Moses Coffee

How does Moses make his coffee?

Question 7

Kangaroo Joke

What do kangaroos wear to work?

Question 8

Animal Wig Joke

What kind of animal needs to wear a wig?

Question 9

Face Mask

Thinking a face mask is going to stop Corona Virus is like thinking you underwear will stop a fart.

Question 10

Happy Husband Joke

Your job as a woman is to observe when your man is happy and immediately put a stop to that nonsense!

Question 11

Soldier Pun

A soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.

Question 12

Brake Fluid Pun

I know a guy who is addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop anytime.

Question 13

The Only Art Coming Out Of You Joke

The only art coming out of you is in a fart!

Question 14

New Deodorant

I bought a new deodorant today. The instructions said, "Remove cap and push up bottom." Now I can barely walk, but whenever I fart, the room smells lovely!

Question 15

Skeleton At A Restaurant Joke

What's a skeleton's favorite thing to order at a restaruant?

Question 16

Zombie Looks Joke

Why don’t zombies care about looks?

Question 17

Today's Math Problem

If George is 68 and his girlfriend is 22, how much money does George have?

Question 18

What Is The Difference Between A Man Buying A Lottery Ticket And A Man Arguing With His Wife Joke

What is the difference between a man buying a lottery ticket and a man arguing with his wife?

Question 19

Fattest Knight

What’s the name of the fattest knight at the Round Table?

Question 20

High School Reunion

Have you ever been guilty of looking at someone your own age and thinking, "Surely, I can't look that old?". I was sitting in the waiting room, for my first appointment, with my new dentist. I noticed his diploma, on the wall, which showed his full name. Suddenly, I remembered a tall handsome boy who had been in my high school class some 40 years ago. I thought, "Could this be the same guy a had a secret crush on way back then?" Upon seeing him, however, I quickly discarded any such thought. The balding, gray-haired man with a deeply lined face was way too old to have been my classmate. After he examined my teeth, I asked him if he attended my high school. "Yes. Yes, I did." he beamed with pride. "When did you graduate?" I asked. He answered, "1959, why do you ask?" "You were in my class!" I exclaimed. He looked at me closely. Then, that ugly old, bald, wrinkled, fat, gray, decrepit old son-of-a-gun asked, "What class did you teach?"

Question 21

Trophy Wife Joke

My friend has a trophy wife... Apparently, he didn't get first place.

Question 22

Two Kids Drinking Battery Acid And Eating Fireworks Arrested On The 4th Of July Joke

The police arrested two kids on the 4th of July, one was drinking battery acid and the other was eating fireworks. What did the police do?

Question 23

Pet Store Pun

The local pet store is having a free giveaway on birds today...no perches necessary.

Question 24

Alberts Brother

We all know that Albert Einstein was a genius but...

Question 25

The Wife Is Always Right

Nine out of Ten husbands agreed that their wives are always right... The 10th husband hasn't been seen since the study was conducted.

Question 26

Astronaut’s Favorite Part Of A Computer

What’s an astronaut’s favorite part of a computer?

Question 27

Quick Money For Dummies Joke

I'm reading a book called "Quick Money for Dummies", by Robin Banks.

Question 28

Political Lawn Signs

It's important to look carefully at lawn signs during an election. Last time I voted for a real estate agent.

Question 29

Canary Island Joke

Did you know there are no canaries on the Canary Islands? Same as with the Virgin Islands... No canaries there either.

Question 30

Gust Of Winds Favorite Color Joke

What is a gust of wind's favorite color?

The Joker

Birds And Bees Joke

Poop Joke

Beautifiers

Two Dogs And A Cat Go To Heaven Joke

When It Rains

Moses Coffee

Kangaroo Joke

Animal Wig Joke

Face Mask

Happy Husband Joke

Soldier Pun

Brake Fluid Pun

The Only Art Coming Out Of You Joke

New Deodorant

Skeleton At A Restaurant Joke

Zombie Looks Joke

Today's Math Problem

What Is The Difference Between A Man Buying A Lottery Ticket And A Man Arguing With His Wife Joke

Fattest Knight

High School Reunion

Trophy Wife Joke

Two Kids Drinking Battery Acid And Eating Fireworks Arrested On The 4th Of July Joke

Pet Store Pun

Alberts Brother

The Wife Is Always Right

Astronaut’s Favorite Part Of A Computer

Quick Money For Dummies Joke

Political Lawn Signs

Canary Island Joke

Gust Of Winds Favorite Color Joke

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