The Joker

Question 1

Take Off Your Bra

I spent twenty minutes trying to get my wife's bra off, I've decided to give up! I wished I had never put it on now.

Question 2

Texas Capital

Question 3

Computer Password Joke

A husband and wife are trying to set up a new password for their computer. The husband puts, "My penis" and the wife falls to the ground laughing, because on-screen it says, "Error, not long enough."

Question 4

Communist Joke

I prefer communist jokes because everyone gets them.

Question 5

Brunette Joke #2

What's a brunette's mating call?

Question 6

Unemployment Joke

I have a lot of unemployment jokes but none of them work.

Question 7

Hard Tea Joke

What is the hardest tea to swallow!

Question 8

Korean Martial Artist Joke

I once met a Korean martial artist who was giving away free chocolate bars. I asked him if I could take two. He said “No! You can Taekwondo.”

Question 9

Two Lesbians In A Closet Joke

What do you call two lesbians in a closet?

Question 10

Old Lady Joke

What did one saggy boob say to the other?

Question 11

Cops And Robbers Joke

George an 83-year-old man, was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garage, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the garage stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked "Is your garage detached from your house" and he said yes. Then they said that all patrols were busy and that he should simply go back into his house, lock his door and an officer would be along when available. George said "Okay," hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again. "Hello. I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my garage. Well, you don’t have to worry about them now cause I’ve just shot them all." Then he hung up. Within five minutes 6 police cars, a SWAT team, a helicopter, and an ambulance showed up at George's residence. Of course, the police caught the burglars red-handed. One of the policemen said to George: "I thought you said that you'd shot them!" George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

Question 12

Giving Up Drinking

I'm giving up drinking until this is over...

Question 13

Heavier Than Butane Jokes

Why is water heavier than butane?

Question 14

Being A Man Joke

Being a man means doing what I want when I want and not having to answer to... Shoot she's coming!!! To be continued.

Question 15

Giraffe Fart Joke

I bet giraffes don't even know what farts smell like.

Question 16

Orchestra Got Electrocuted Joke

Did you hear about the orchestra that got electrocuted?

Question 17

What's The Difference Between Snow Men And Snow Women?

What's the difference between snow men and snow women?

Question 18

Chewing Electric Cords Joke

I caught my son chewing on electrical cords. So I grounded him. He's doing better currently. And conducting himself properly...

Question 19

Say Grace

Does your family say a prayer before you eat food? Nope, we're Italian, my mom knows how to cook.

Question 20

Flower Ride Its Bike Joke

Why couldn't the flower ride its bike?

Question 21

No House Numbers Joke

If your home doesn't have house numbers on it, you should address that!

Question 22

Tree Scientist Joke

What do you call a tree that does science experiments?

Question 23

Mile Per Gallon Joke

The average human walks 900 miles per year and drinks 2.2 gallons of beer, which means the average human gets 41 miles per gallon!

Question 24

People Who Never Get Angry Joke

What kind of people never get angry?

Question 25

An Elderly Couple Driving Across The Country Joke

Morty and Selma, an elderly couple, were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said, "Ma'am did you know you were speeding?" Selma, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" Morty yelled, "He says you were speeding!" The patrolman said, "May I see your license?" Selma turned to her husband once again and asked, "What did he say?" Morty yelled, "He wants to see your license!" Selma gave the officer her license. The patrolman then said, "I see you are from New York. I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the most annoying woman I've ever met." Selma turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" Morty yells, "He said he thinks he knows you!"

Question 26

Stunning Girlfriend Joke

The guy next to me on the train pointed to a photograph and said "This is my girlfriend, isn't she beautiful?" "If you think she is beautiful, you should see my wife," says I. "Why is she stunning?" "No, she's an optician!"

Question 27

Fake Noodle Joke

What do you call a fake noodle?

Question 28

Potato Head Joke

No matter how bad your life is, just remember... There are people out there worried about the gender of a plastic potato.

Question 29

An Old Cowboy Bar Joke

An old cowboy goes into a bar and orders a drink. As he sits there sipping his whiskey, a young lady sits down next to him. She turns to the cowboy and asks him, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replies, "Well, I've spent my whole life on the ranch, herding horses, mending fences, and branding cattle, so I guess I am." She says, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. When I shower or watch TV, everything seems to make me think of women." A little while later, a couple sits down next to the old cowboy and asks him, "Are you a real cowboy? "He replies, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."

Question 30

Drinking Wine Joke

Put a glass of wine in each room of your house and call it a wine tour.

The Joker

Take Off Your Bra

Texas Capital

Computer Password Joke

Communist Joke

Brunette Joke #2

Unemployment Joke

Hard Tea Joke

Korean Martial Artist Joke

Two Lesbians In A Closet Joke

Old Lady Joke

Cops And Robbers Joke

Giving Up Drinking

Heavier Than Butane Jokes

Being A Man Joke

Giraffe Fart Joke

Orchestra Got Electrocuted Joke

What's The Difference Between Snow Men And Snow Women?

Chewing Electric Cords Joke

Say Grace

Flower Ride Its Bike Joke

No House Numbers Joke

Tree Scientist Joke

Mile Per Gallon Joke

People Who Never Get Angry Joke

An Elderly Couple Driving Across The Country Joke

Stunning Girlfriend Joke

Fake Noodle Joke

Potato Head Joke

An Old Cowboy Bar Joke

Drinking Wine Joke

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