I'm not always right, but I'm never wrong!
Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity.
We are born naked, wet, and hungry... Then things get worse.
If you took an IQ test, the results would be negative.
Eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
Grandchildren are spoiled because you can't spank Grandma!
I'm not an alcoholic. I'm a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings.
Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home.
My computer doesn't understand me!
Time is what keeps everything from happening at once.