Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because it wasn't peeling well.
Why do sharks swim in salt water?
Because pepper water makes them sneeze.
If it's not yours, don't take it. If it's not true, don't say it. If it's not right, don't do it.
If you go Skydiving, and your parachute fails, you have the rest of your life to try to fix it.
I asked my grandfather for twenty dollars. "Twenty dollars?!" he said. "For What?" "To buy groceries," I told him. "When I was a boy," my grandfather said. "My mama would give me a dollar, just one dollar, and I'd go to the store and come home with two loaves of bread, two sacks of potatoes, a carton of eggs, three bottles of milk, and can of coffee and a box of tea." He shrugged and paused. "Times have changed and you can't do that now," he told me. "Too many security cameras."
When chimney sweeps dress in the morning, are they "Sooting up?"
Can you tie a knot? "I cannot." "So can you tie a knot?" "No, I cannot knot." "Not knot?" "Who's there?"
In the US, a book titled: "How to change your wife in 30 days", sold 50 million copies in one week, before the author discovered that the title had a spelling error! The correct title was: "How to change your life in 30 days". After the correction, for a whole month, one 2 copies were sold.
A big nose is not an excuse to not wear a mask! I mean, I still wear underwear!
