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I had a happy childhood; Dad would roll me down the hill in a tire. Those were Goodyears.
Three weeks ago I sent my hearing aids in for repair... I've heard nothing since.
We all know that mirrors don't lie... I'm just grateful they don't laugh!
I don't mind getting older... But my body is taking it badly!
I'm thinking about taking the wine box back to complain. It said once opened it would last 6 weeks, it only lasted me 3 hours!
This is the first year I'm not going to Fiji due to COVID-19. I usually don't go because I'm poor!
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia, and learned that if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya.
A neighbor suggested I put manure on my strawberries. Tasted horrible! I'm sticking with whipped cream!
This was a terrible day. First my ex-wife got hit by a bus. Then, I lost my job as a bus driver.
Guys I need your help... I'm in the middle of an argument with my wife and she just told me that I'm right. What the hell do I do next?!