I accidentally gave my wife a glue stick instead of Chapstick She’s still not talking to me!

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

Where do you take someone when they've been in a peek-a-boo accident?

The I.C.U.

I like to tell chemistry jokes, but I never get a good reaction.

Why did the bicycle collapse?

Because it was two tired.

Thinking a face mask is going to stop Corona Virus is like thinking you underwear will stop a fart.

Hey, did you hear about the actress Reese... something, who commited suicide?

Reese Witherspoon? No, with her knife!

I went to the psychiatrist today. She told me I have a split personality and charged me $160.

I gave her $80 and told her to get the rest from the other idiot.

Why should you never trust Atoms?

Because they make up everything!

Why did the dad cross the road?

To find out the punchline to why the chicken crossed the road.

USER JOKES INDEX