Once there were three friends, None, Someone, and Mad. One day they went to a park and suddenly None started fighting with Someone. Mad didn't know what to do so he called the near security guard. He said, "Security, None is fighting with Someone! ".The security look t him surprisingly and said, "Are you mad?". Then Mad said, "Yes, I am Mad." Then the security took Mad to the police station and None and Someone kept fighting.
What's the real reason a brunette keeps her figure?
No one else wants it.
What do you call a brunette who dies her hair blonde?
Artificial Stupidity.
What kind of costumes do brunette girls wear on Halloween?
They just stand on their heads and go as dirty mops.
Why don't brunettes get breast implants?
They've already spent their money on thigh and butt implants.
Me: (Sobbing my heart out, eyes swollen, nose red)... I can't see you anymore... I am not going to let you hurt me like this again! Trainer: It was a sit up. You did one sit up.
A man and a woman were having a quiet, romantic dinner in a fine restaurant. They were gazing lovingly at each other and holding hands. The waitress, taking another order at a table a few steps away, suddenly noticed the man slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, but the woman stared straight ahead. The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table. Still, the woman stared straight ahead. The waitress, thinking this behavior a bit risqué and that it might offend other diners, went over to the table and, tactfully, began by saying to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."The woman calmly looked up at her and said, "No, he didn't. He just walked in the door."
A Woman tried to cut off her lover's penis, missed and cut his thigh, charged with a misdaweiner.
Have you ever noticed that a woman's "I'll be ready in 5 minutes" and a man's "I'll be home if 5 minutes" are exactly the same?
