USER JOKES INDEX

They Say We Can Have Gatherings With Up To Eight People Without Issues. I Don't Even Know Eight People Without Issues.

Some people won't admit their faults. I would, if I had any.

How long is this social distancing supposed to last? My wife keeps trying to come in the house.

When I go to someone else's house and they tell me to make myself at home, the first thing I do is throw them out because I don't like visitors.

2020 should be a new cuss word like, "I don't give a 2020!"

Today I saw an ad that said, "radio for sale $1, volume stuck on full." I thought, "I can't turn that down."

The Devil called down to Georgia, he was looking for some votes to steal. He was in a bind because he was behind and he was willing to make a deal.

A new study found that people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychopathic behavior. And people who order a quad shot, non-fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with caramel drizzle are more likely to become their victims.

I'm posting this with a heavy heart... As much as I love photography and everything that comes with it, it is taking up too much of my time. I am struggling to keep up with the everyday basics of cleaning, cooking, and maintaining the home. So something has to give. I have decided to get rid of my gear. Below is a list of what is available. Serious inquiries only, no stupid offers please. Thanks for reading and understanding. Here is what I have for sale: 1. Vacuum cleaner 2. Dustpan and brush 3. Mop and bucket 4. Cat 5. Iron 6. Laundry detergent 7. Various Mr Muscle products Thank you.

I just called my bank and told them that they counted wrong so I want to find $11,780 in my account by tomorrow!