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Why can't a mountain get stronger?
Because it's fitness level has peaked.
How do you cut lightning?
With bolt cutters!
What do you call a superhero with a bad sense of direction?
Wander Woman!
Tom the turkey played baseball... Unfortunately, he hit a fowl ball!
The guy who stole my iPad... He should FaceTime!
A train worker was struck by lightning... He was a great conductor!
I buy all my weapons from a guy named T-REX... He's a small arms dealer!
What did the upset toast say about my compliments?
Don't butter me up.
Saturday and Sunday's are the strongest days... all the rest are weak days!
What do kangaroos wear to work?
Jump suits.
