WARNING!
When hiking, please take precaution and
affix little bells to clothing to avoid surprising a bear.
You are further advised to carry pepper spray in case of a bear encounter.
Be vigilant and know the difference between bear feces. Black bear feces is smaller and contains berries and squirrel fur.
Grizzly bear feces has bells in it and smells like pepper.
What do you call a moose with no name?
Anony-moose! (Anonymous)
Why did King Von always carry a pen?
Because he was always ready to "write" his crazy story!
What do you get when you cross a shark with a skunk?
As far away as possible.
POV: You're a cop and your partner's name is Phil. You just watched a woman commit a crime on the senate floor, "Phil Uhhhh Bust Her." (Filabuster)
I'm now at the age when "Picking up a hottie" means buying a rotisserie chicken at Costco.
