What did the flame say to his buddies after he fell in love?

I have found the perfect match!

What did one penny say to the other penny on Valentine's day?

Let's get together and make some cents!

I keep trying to lose weight but it keeps finding me!

I couldn't understand why I couldn't lose weight. Turns out there were saying KETO, not Cheeto!

For the new year, I've been trying intermittent fasting. So far I'm up to 12 minutes without eating and to be honest, I love the results!

I try to avoid things that make me fat... Like scales, mirrors, and photographs!

If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn't contain any calories.

What did the kitten say when its cat food was stolen?

Are you kitten me!

How much did Santa pay to park his sleigh?

Nothing it was on the house.

Who is Santa's favorite singer?

Elf-is Presley!

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