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Always wanted to be a comedian but everyone just laughed at me!
Google must be a woman because it knows everything!
A woman sued a Hospital stating that after a recent treatment her husband had lost all interest in sex. The Hospital in their defense stated... "All we did was correct his eyesight!"
I never really believed in Santa, always was a rebel without a claus.
A synonym is a word you use when you can't spell the other one.
Why do women have small feet?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
I told my wife I wanted to be cremated. She made me an appointment for Tuesday.
I don't mean to brag but cashiers are always checking me out.
If marriage were outlawed, only outlaws would have in-laws.
Some days you're the Dog, & Some days you're the Hydrant.
