If anyone gets a message from me about canned meat don’t open it... It's Spam!
I saw a dwarf climbing down a prison wall!
I thought to my self, "that's a little condescending"
How can you tell when you've reached middles age?
When you're faced with two temptations and you choose the one that'll get you home at 9 o'clock.
I've decided to quit my job as a personal trainer because I'm not big enough or strong enough... I've just handed in my TOO WEAK notice!
Your final memory will be going down a dark tunnel with a light at the end... That's my earliest memory too!
