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National Hot Dog Day Joke - Buddhist Pun

A Buddhist goes up to a hotdog vendor and says "make me one with everything".

Army Bush Pun

If you don't know what this is don't ever join the Army. You don't even know an ambush when you see one.

Corduroy Pillow Pun

Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? They're really making headlines.

Time Travel Pun

I was time traveling yesterday but I got hungry, so I went back four seconds.

No Eye Dear Joke

What do you call a deer with no eyes? ...no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? ....still no eye deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes, no legs having sex? ...still fucking no eye deer.

Geico Pun

if Geico ever fired the gecko that would be a reptile disfunction.

Ohno Bird Joke

Did you ever hear about the Ohno bird? It has two-inch long legs and a four-inch cock. Every time he lands you can hear him say "ohno ohno"

Pterodactyl Pun

The reason you can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom is because the pee is silent.

Human Intelligence

So somewhere out in space two alien life forms are talking with each other. The first one says "The dominant life forms on the planet earth have developed satellite-based nuclear weapons "The second one asks, "Are they an emerging intelligence?" The first alien replies, " I don't think so. they have them aimed at themselves!".

Don't Text And Drive

Honk if you love Jesus... text if you want to meet him!

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