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New Baby

One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some errands, so the proud father stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of, but the baby just wouldn't stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to all the father had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby's ears, chest and then down to the diaper area. When he opened the diaper, he found was indeed full. "Here's the problem," the doctor explained. "He just needs to be changed." The perplexed father remarked, "But the diaper package specifically says it's good for up to 10 pounds!"

Gap Smile

The gap between your teeth is so big, I don't know whether to smile back or kick a field goal.

Yo Mamma So Stupid She Took A Ruler To Bed...

Your momma is so stupid, she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept!

Around The House

You're so fat, when you sit around the house, you really sit around the house.

Looks Are Indecent

You're so ugly when you go outside your arrested for indecent exposure.

You Were An Ugly Baby

You were so ugly as a baby you were the poster child on the birth control posters.

I Never Forget A Face

"I never forget a face. However, in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception." -Groucho Marx

Perfect Idiot

People say you are the perfect idiot. I say you are not perfect, but you are doing pretty good.

Round Room

How do you confuse a stupid person?

I Though I Was Stupid

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I thought I was stupid, Then I met you!

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