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Listening

No one is listening to you until you make a mistake.

Corduroy

Corduroy pillows, they're making headlines.

Physics Meets Star Wars

When physics meets Star Wars: May the net force be with you!

Borrow Money From A Pessamist

Why should you borrow money from a pessamist?

An Unbreakable Toy Is...

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

Christmas Sweater

I got a sweater for Christmas. I really wanted a screamer or a moaner.

Not Only...

Not only am I redundant and superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.

A Group Of Chess Enthusiasts

A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

Donkey And Onion

What do you get when you cross a donkey with an onion?

Peer Pressure

Reporters interviewing a 104 year-old woman: "And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?" the reporter asked.

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