The Joker

Question 1

Google Joke

Google must be a woman because it knows everything!

Question 2

Chicken Sandwiches Joke

I bought a chicken to make sandwiches. It doesn't! It just craps on the floor.

Question 3

Beard Pun

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

Question 4

Pirates Favorite Country

What's is a pirates favorite country?

Question 5

Take Off Your Bra

I spent twenty minutes trying to get my wife's bra off, I've decided to give up! I wished I had never put it on now.

Question 6

Texas Capital

What is the capital of Texas?

Question 7

Communist Joke

I prefer communist jokes because everyone gets them.

Question 8

Brunette Joke #2

What's a brunette's mating call?

Question 9

Unemployment Joke

I have a lot of unemployment jokes but none of them work.

Question 10

Hard Tea Joke

What is the hardest tea to swallow!

Question 11

Korean Martial Artist Joke

I once met a Korean martial artist who was giving away free chocolate bars. I asked him if I could take two. He said “No! You can Taekwondo.”

Question 12

Old Lady Joke

What did one saggy boob say to the other?

Question 13

Cops And Robbers Joke

George an 83-year-old man, was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garage, which she could see from the bedroom window. George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the garage stealing things. He phoned the police, who asked "Is your garage detached from your house" and he said yes. Then they said that all patrols were busy and that he should simply go back into his house, lock his door and an officer would be along when available. George said "Okay," hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again. "Hello. I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people in my garage. Well, you don’t have to worry about them now cause I’ve just shot them all." Then he hung up. Within five minutes 6 police cars, a SWAT team, a helicopter, and an ambulance showed up at George's residence. Of course, the police caught the burglars red-handed. One of the policemen said to George: "I thought you said that you'd shot them!" George said, "I thought you said there was nobody available!"

Question 14

Giving Up Drinking

I'm giving up drinking until this is over...

Question 15

Favorite Child Joke

It turns out that when you're asked who your favorite child is, you're expected to pick from you own. I know that now.

Question 16

Heavier Than Butane Jokes

Why is water heavier than butane?

Question 17

Being A Man Joke

Being a man means doing what I want when I want and not having to answer to... Shoot she's coming!!! To be continued.

Question 18

Giraffe Fart Joke

I bet giraffes don't even know what farts smell like.

Question 19

Orchestra Got Electrocuted Joke

Did you hear about the orchestra that got electrocuted?

Question 20

Old Married Couple Joke

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about. For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totalling $95,000. He asked her about the contents. 'When we were to be married,' she said, ' my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.' The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving!! He almost burst with happiness. 'Honey,' he said, 'that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?' 'Oh,' she said, 'that's the money I made from selling the dolls.'

Question 21

Chewing Electric Cords Joke

I caught my son chewing on electrical cords. So I grounded him. He's doing better currently. And conducting himself properly...

Question 22

Say Grace

Does your family say a prayer before you eat food? Nope, we're Italian, my mom knows how to cook.

Question 23

Flower Ride Its Bike Joke

Why couldn't the flower ride its bike?

Question 24

No House Numbers Joke

If your home doesn't have house numbers on it, you should address that!

Question 25

Tree Scientist Joke

What do you call a tree that does science experiments?

Question 26

Mile Per Gallon Joke

The average human walks 900 miles per year and drinks 2.2 gallons of beer, which means the average human gets 41 miles per gallon!

Question 27

Stunning Girlfriend Joke

The guy next to me on the train pointed to a photograph and said "This is my girlfriend, isn't she beautiful?" "If you think she is beautiful, you should see my wife," says I. "Why is she stunning?" "No, she's an optician!"

Question 28

Drinking Wine Joke

Put a glass of wine in each room of your house and call it a wine tour.

Question 29

Why Did The Thief Wear Blue Gloves?

Why did the thief wear blue gloves?

Question 30

Coke Vs. Deer Testicles Joke.

What’s the difference between a liter of Coke and deer testicles?

The Joker

Google Joke

Chicken Sandwiches Joke

Beard Pun

Pirates Favorite Country

Take Off Your Bra

Texas Capital

Communist Joke

Brunette Joke #2

Unemployment Joke

Hard Tea Joke

Korean Martial Artist Joke

Old Lady Joke

Cops And Robbers Joke

Giving Up Drinking

Favorite Child Joke

Heavier Than Butane Jokes

Being A Man Joke

Giraffe Fart Joke

Orchestra Got Electrocuted Joke

Old Married Couple Joke

Chewing Electric Cords Joke

Say Grace

Flower Ride Its Bike Joke

No House Numbers Joke

Tree Scientist Joke

Mile Per Gallon Joke

Stunning Girlfriend Joke

Drinking Wine Joke

Why Did The Thief Wear Blue Gloves?

Coke Vs. Deer Testicles Joke.

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