235 Puns - Fart.com

Jan 21, 2020 Last updated: Sep 08, 2020

Puns

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Termite Joke

A termite walks into a bar and asks, "Is the bartender here?"

Internship Pun

What was the blonde college student doing at the harbor?

Puns — Internship Pun Joke Meme.

One Halloween Night....

One Halloween a man was walking down the street and heard a thumping noise behind him. Looking behind him he saw a coffin following him, upright. He was a bit nervous and began walking a little bit faster. The coffin continued, "thumpety thump, thumpety thump". He began running and the coffin kept up and began opening and closing, ""thumpety thump, thumpety thump clap, "thumpety thump, thumpety thump clap". Terrified he ran to his front door, and went inside, slamming the door and locking it. The coffin continued, "thumpety thump, thumpety thump - CRASH" it came right through the door, He ran up the stairs, and right behind him, "thumpety thump, thumpety thump clap, "thumpety thump, thumpety thump clap". He rushed into the bathroom and slammed the door, but the coffin broke through the door - "thumpety thump, thumpety thump crash". Terrified the man grabbed the first thing he could, a bottle of Robitussin and threw it - and the coffin stopped!

Is TV Making You Dumb?

I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called 'brightness' but it doesn't work.

A Gentleman Walks Into Bar...

A gentleman walks into bar, and to his horror, sees a screaming naked lady tied to the wall while the bartender licks her! The guy runs out and calles the police. He is even more horrified when the police say there is nothing they can do; the bartender has a lick-her (liquor) license.

Puns — A gentleman walks into bar... Joke Meme

No Pun

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

Hungry Lion Joke

A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat. He came across two men. One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter. The lion quickly pounced on the man reading the book and devoured him. Even the king of the jungle knows that readers digest and writers cramp.

Well Rounded Church

There was a congregation that decided to have four worship services each Sunday. There was one for those new to the faith. Another for those who liked traditional worship. One for those who had lost their faith and would like to get it back. And another for those who had a bad experience with church and were complaining about it. They have names for each of the services: "Finders, Keepers, Losers, Weepers."

Puns — Well Rounded Church Joke Meme

Why Did The Pencil Cross The Road?

Why did the pencil cross the road?

Hairdressers

Why are hairdressers always on time?

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