JOKES INDEX

Joke: Lettuce come together. Romaine Calm. This may be just the tip of the iceberg.

Joke: My doctor has given me three days to give up drinking. I've picked the 5th of June, July 17th, and October 9th!

Joke: A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. "What are you doing?" she asked. "Hunting flies," he replied. "Oh, killed any?" she asked. "Yep, 3 males and 2 females," he answered. Intrigued the wife asked, "How can you tell them apart?" The husband replied, "3 were on a beer can and 2 were on the phone."

Joke: To the person who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

Joke: I watch my dog chase his tail for five minutes and thought, "Wow! Dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized, I just watched my dog chase his tail for five minutes.

Joke: I got a call from the police station saying they want to interview me. Funny, I don't remember applying for a job there.

Joke: I called my boss and asked if I could come in a little late. He said, "Dream on." I think that was really nice of him.

Joke: Don't let them take your temperature on your forehead when you enter the supermarket, because it erases your memory. I went in for macaroni and cheese and came out with two cases of beer!

Joke: I'll tell you why I can't lose weight... I've got metal fillings in my teeth and the refrigerator magnets keep pulling me into the kitchen.

Joke: In life, it is very important to know when to stop arguing with people and just let them be wrong!