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Joke: Sitting next to each other on a plane is a blond woman and a lawyer. To make the plane ride a bit more interesting, the lawyer suggests that he and the blond play a game. "We each take turns to ask a question, and if you answer wrong you must give me $5 and if I answer wrong I give you $5." The blond woman says nothing. "Okay," says the man, "if I answer wrong, I have to give you $50, but if you answer wrong you only have to give me $5." "Alright," says the blond, "you go first." The man asks her "what is the distance from Earth to the nearest star?" the woman says nothing and hands $5 to the man. "What has five legs, is covered in pink and purple spots, and lives on a hill?" The lawyer, never having heard this riddle, gave the woman $50. "Wait," he said, "what is the answer to that question?" Without saying a word, the woman hands him $5.
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Joke: What are a blonde's first words after 4 years of college?
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Blonde Jokes
Joke: A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capitol building. Unfortunately, she couldn't find it, so she asked a police officer for directions - "Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?" The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the number 54 bus. It'll take you right there." She thanked the officer and he drives off. Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop. The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus and that was three hours ago! Why are you still waiting?" The blonde replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now... The 45th bus just went by!"
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Joke: One day two blondes decided to take a trip to Disneyland. They were driving down the road and all of a sudden they came to an intersection where there was a sign read, Disneyland left. The two blonds looked at each other and said "Shoot!" and went back home.
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Joke: Why did the blonde jump off the bridge?
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Blonde Jokes
Joke: A blonde lived on a farm. He didn't get many visitors, so I went to see him. . . when I got there, he was standing stiff as a board, out in the middle of the cow paddock. I yelled out to him, and asked what he was doing standing out there all still and straight. He replied that he was trying to win a Noble Peace prize. I said, "Well, that's great, but what are you doing in the paddock? "He replied, "I was reading the newspaper, and it said all you had to do to win the Noble Peace prize was to be outstanding in your field. "
Punch Line
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Joke: There was a blonde sitting on a plane in first-class seats with an economy class ticket. The flight attendant asked to check her ticket. "Excuse me," she said "You only have an economy class ticket but you are sitting in first class. Could you please move to your allocated seat?" The blonde was very stubborn and said "I'm blonde and beautiful and I'm going to New York. "So the flight attendant went to another flight attendant and told her the problem. Her answer was the same." I'm blonde and beautiful and I'm going to new york." This went on with four other flight attendants. Finally, they went to the captain and told him the problem. He said, "I can handle this," and went to talk to her. He whispered something in her ear and she got up and ran to economy class. All the flight attendants were shocked and they asked him how he did it. He said, "I told her first class wasn't going to New York."
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Joke: What is the definition of eternity?
Punch Line
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Blonde Jokes
Joke: Two programmers walked along the street. They saw a beautiful blonde not far away and one of them said, "Too bad that girls have no standard interface." "They have," replied the other programmer, "but there is no standard way to get to it."
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Joke: A young brunette goes into the doctors office and says that her body hurts whever she touches it. "Impossible", says the doctor. "show me". She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee and screams, she pushes her ankle and screams and so it goes on, everywhere she touches make her scream. The doctor says, "Your not really a brunette, are you?" No, im a blonde, she says. "I though so", he says. "Your finger is broken."
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