Animal Jokes Page 12 of 29 Fart.com

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A Weasel Walked Into A Bar

Did you hear about the weasel that walked into a bar in Minnesota? The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" "Pop" goes the weasel!

Mark The Hunter

Mark was excited about his new .338 rifle and decided to try bear hunting. He traveled up to Alaska, spotted a small brown bear and shot it. Soon after there was a tap on his shoulder, and he turned around to see a big black bear. The black bear said, "That was a very bad mistake. That bear was my cousin. I'm going to give you two choices. Either I maul you to death or we have sex." After considering briefly, Mark decided to accept the latter alternative. So the black bear had his way with Mark. Even though he felt sore for two weeks, Mark soon recovered and vowed revenge. He headed out on another trip to Alaska where he found the black bear and shot it dead. Right after, there was another tap on his shoulder. This time a huge grizzly bear stood right next to him. The grizzly said, "That was a big mistake, Mark. That bear was my cousin and you've got two choices: Either I maul you to death or we have rough sex." Again, Mark thought it was better to cooperate with the grizzly bear than be mauled to death. So the grizzly had his way with Mark. Although he survived, it took several months before Mark fully recovered. Now Mark was completely outraged, so he headed back to Alaska and managed to track down the grizzly bear and shot it. He felt sweet revenge, but then, moments later, there was a tap on his shoulder. He turned around to find a giant polar bear standing there. The polar bear looked at him and said, "Admit it, Mark, you don't come here for the hunting, do you?

Animal Jokes — Mark the Hunter Joke Meme.

Sleeping Cows

If you notice cows sleeping in a field, does that mean it's pasture bedtime?

Crowbar Joke

A little know fact... Before the crowbar was invented, most crows drank at home.

Milkless Cow

If a cow doesn't produce milk, is it a milk dud or an utter failure?

Animal Jokes — Milkless Cow Joke Meme

Kangaroo Joke

What do kangaroos wear to work?

I Buy All My Weapons From A Guy Named T-REX Joke

I buy all my weapons from a guy named T-REX... He's a small arms dealer!

Tom The Turkey Joke

Tom the turkey played baseball... Unfortunately, he hit a fowl ball!

Animal Jokes — Tom the turkey joke Joke Meme

Mother Of Jesus Joke

Since Mary is the mother of Jesus and Jesus is the lamb of God... Does that mean Mary had a little lamb?

Crabs Joke

Why do crabs never give to charity?

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