63 WORK JOKES

Joke: I got fired from my job at the calendar factory. I should have never taken a couple days off.

Joke: The IRS suspected a fishing boat owner wasn’t paying proper wages to his deckhands and sent an agent to investigate him. IRS Auditor asks "I need to talk with you about your employees and how much you pay them". Boat Capitan responds "Well, there's Clarence, my deckhand, he's been with me for about 3 years. I pay him $1,000 a week plus free room and board". IRS auditor "That's fair, so who is the other guy on the boat that I see in your records. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of the workaround here and only makes about $10 per week and it says you buy him a bottle of Bacardi and a twelve-pack once a week too. Also says he gets to sleep with your wife occasionally?" the IRS Auditor says "That's the guy we want to talk to". The Boat Capitan replies "That would be me, what do you to know?"

Joke: I used to have a job cleaning mirrors but I couldn't see myself doing it for a living.

Joke: I never really wanted to believe that my friend, a road worker, was stealing from his job but when I went to his house there they were. I should have known, all the signs were right there.

Joke: I've done some terrible things for money... Like getting up early to go to work.

Joke: Son, "Dad, I'm considering a career in organized crime." Dad, "Government or private sector?"

Joke: If you ever get caught sleeping on the job... slowly raise your head and say "In Jesus Name, Amen"

Joke: Did a little mechanic work today. Put a rear end in a recliner.

Joke: I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A women asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Joke: As I get older and I remember all the people I've lost along the way, I think to myself, maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for me.