Joke: We have studied Americans' favorite sports and came up with a conclusion.
1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL. 2. The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING. 3. The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL. 4. The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL. 5. The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS. 6. The sport of choice for corporate officers is GOLF.
AMAZING CONCLUSION: The higher you are in the corporate structure, the smaller your balls become.
Joke: There was a blonde who had taken up golf. She played her 1st round, and back in after only 20 minutes. She told the pro she was stung by a bee. He asked where. She said, "Between the first hole and the second hole." He said, "Sounds like your stance is too wide."
Joke: A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened. "Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she sliced her ball into a pasture of cows. We went to look for it and while I was rooting around I noticed that one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail and sure enough, there was my wife's golf ball... stuck right in the middle of the cows butt. That's when I made my mistake." "What did you do?" asks the doctor. "Well, I lifted the tail and yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!'"
Joke: Hours after the end of the world, a border dispute emerged between heaven and hell. God, invited the devil for conversations to find a way to resolve this dispute quickly. Satan proposed a soccer game between heaven and hell. God, always fair, said to the devil, "The heat must be affecting your brain, the game would be so one sided. Don't you know all the 'good' players go to heaven?" The devil, smiling, responded "Yeah, but we've got all the refs!"
Joke: Four football fans go rock climbing one afternoon: a Patriots fan, a Falcons fan, an Eagles fan, and a Steelers fan. They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who among them was the most "die-hard" fan. Upon reaching the top of the mountain, the Patriots fan proclaimed to the other three... "This is for the New England Patriots!" and promptly threw himself off the mountain as a form of sacrifice. Not to be outdone by a Patriots fan, the Falcons fan jumped up and said... "This is for the Atlanta Falcons!" and then threw himself off the mountain, again as a form of sacrifice. Refusing to be outdone by the Patriots and Falcons fans, the Steelers fan rose to his feet and yelled at the top of his lungs, "This is for the Pittsburgh Steelers!" and without hesitation, pushed the Philadelphia Eagles fan off the mountain.
Joke: A teacher asks her students if they're Yankees fans. All of the hands go up except for one student. "Okay, Bobby. What team are you a fan of?" "The Red Sox." "Why's that?" "Well, my parents are both Red Sox fans, so I'm a Red Sox fan too." "That's not a good answer, Bobby. If your parents were both morons, would you be a moron too?" "No, that would make me a Yankees fan!"
Joke: A friend of mine has two tickets for the Super Bowl, both box seats! He paid $2,500 each but he didn't realize last year when he bought them, it was going to be on the same day as his wedding. If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place...It's at Holy Cross Church, on Lake Ave at 3 pm. The bride's name is Nicole, she's 5'4", about 115 lbs, good cook too...She'll be the one in the white dress.
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