15 BABY JOKES

Question 1

New Baby

One day, shortly after the birth of their new baby, the mother had to go out to do some errands, so the proud father stayed home to watch his wonderful new son. Soon after the mother left, the baby started to cry. The father did everything he could think of, but the baby just wouldn't stop crying. Finally, the dad got so worried he decided to take the infant to the doctor. After the doctor listened to all the father had done to get the baby to stop crying, the doctor began to examine the baby's ears, chest and then down to the diaper area. When he opened the diaper, he found was indeed full. "Here's the problem," the doctor explained. "He just needs to be changed." The perplexed father remarked, "But the diaper package specifically says it's good for up to 10 pounds!"

Question 2

Group Of Baby Soldiers Joke

What do you call a group of baby soldiers?

Question 3

Twins Favorite Fruit

What are twins favorite fruit?

Question 4

The Advanced Baby

A baby was born that was so advanced that he could talk. He looked around the delivery room and saw the doctor. "Are you my doctor?" he asked. "Yes, I am." The baby said, "Thank you for taking such good care of me during birth." He looked at his mother and asked, "Are you my mother?" "Yes, I am," she said. "Thank you for taking such good care of me before I was born," he said. He then looked at his father and asked, "Are you my father?" "Yes, I am," his father answered. The baby motioned him to come closer, then poked him on the forehead with his index finger 5 times, saying, "I want you to know that, THAT HURTS!"

Question 5

Baby Fish Sleep Joke

Where do baby fish sleep?

Question 6

A New Parents Favorite Christmas Carol Joke

What is my mommy and daddy’s favorite Christmas carol?

Question 7

Name Of The Child

When a women found out that she was pregnant, she lit up the phone lines telling everyone the good news. One day, she took her 4 year old son, Sam, out shopping. A woman asked the boy if he was excited about the baby. "Yes," he said. "I know what we're going to name it. If it is a girl, we're calling her Molly and if it is a boy, we're going to call it Quits."

Question 8

Baby Birth Joke

How did the baby know it was ready to be born?

Question 9

Astronaut Baby Joke

How do you get an astronaut baby to sleep?

Punch Line

VOTE

Question 10

Mom's Lunch Joke

What kind of lunch do moms never prepare in the morning?

Question 11

Pregnant Bed Bug

Did you hear about the pregnant bed bug?

Question 12

Tennessee Babies Joke

Deep In the backwoods of Tennessee, a man's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. Since there was no electricity, the doctor handed the father-to-be a lantern and said, "Here. You hold this high so I can see what I am doing." Soon, a baby boy was brought into the world. Whoa there, said the doctor, "Don't be in such a rush to put that lantern down. I think there's another one coming." Sure enough, within minutes he had delivered a baby girl. "Hold that lantern up, don't set it down there's another one!" said the doctor. Within a few minutes, he had delivered a third baby. "No, don't be in a hurry to put down that lantern, it seems there's yet another one coming!" cried the doctor. The man scratched his head in bewilderment, and asked the doctor, "You reckon it might be the light that's attractin' 'em?

Question 13

Small Lizard Joke

Why did the husband bring his wife a small lizard?

Question 14

Laughing Baby

A baby boy was just born. He had all his pieces and looked quite normal, except that he was laughing - I mean laughing real hard. All the doctors and nurses were examining the little guy in front of his worried parents. He just kept on laughing, his tiny fists all closed and tears rolling from his eyes. One at a time, a pediatrician unfolded his tiny fingers to check if his hand was all right, and guess what he found?

Question 15

A Vey Little Ant Joke

What do you call a very little ant?

15 BABY JOKES

Baby Jokes. Jokes about babies by babies, moms, dads, doctors family, and friends.

New Baby

Group Of Baby Soldiers Joke

Twins Favorite Fruit

The Advanced Baby

Baby Fish Sleep Joke

A New Parents Favorite Christmas Carol Joke

Name Of The Child

Baby Birth Joke

Astronaut Baby Joke

Mom's Lunch Joke

Pregnant Bed Bug

Tennessee Babies Joke

Small Lizard Joke

Laughing Baby

A Vey Little Ant Joke

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