«
1
2
...
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
...
189
190
»

As Stupid As You Look Joke

You are not as stupid as you look. That would be impossible.

Pirate Movie

Did you see that movie about the pirate? It's rated Arrr!

Roman Numerals

A Roman citizen walks into a bar raises two fingers and says to the waiter, "five beers, please."

Fat And Hairy

Yo momma is so fat and hairy, that if she dyed her hair green, people would use her for golf practice.

Yo Momma Is So Fat She Has...

Yo momma so fat she has her own area code.

Don't Drink And Ride

I went to the liquor store Friday afternoon on my bicycle, bought a bottle of Scotch and put it in the bicycle basket. As I was about to leave, I thought to myself, "What if I fell off my bicycle, the bottle would break". So, I drank all the Scotch before I road home. It turned out to be a very good decision, because I fell off my bike seven times on the way home.

Psychic Joke

The other day I went to see a psychic. When I knocked on the door she shouted, "Who's there?" So I left.

Fart Teacher

What do you call a person who teaches you how to fart?

I See You And Jesus Sees You

A burglar was cruising through a posh suburb looking for an opportunity. At one house he saw a truck unloading a big-screen television, stereo, and video outfit. That night, without a moon in the sky and a heavy fog, he drove up to the house. He rang the doorbell and when no one answered, broke the lock on the kitchen door and went in. It was pitch black inside as he made his way through the kitchen, then the dining room and into the den where he expected to find the things he wanted to steal. "I see you and Jesus sees you," a voice said. The burglar froze in his tracks. "I see you and Jesus sees you," the voice said again. When nothing more happened, the burglar took out his flashlight and shined it in the direction of the voice. All he saw was a parrot on its perch. "I see you and Jesus sees you. "The burglar laughed. "Just a dumb bird," he said. The burglar closed the drapes before turning on a lamp and that's when he saw a big and mean-looking Doberman Pincher sitting beneath the parrot's perch. "Sic him, Jesus!", said the parrot.

Stolen Credit Card

Police, "Why didn't you report your credit card stolen?" Man, "The thief was spending less than my wife."

«
1
2
...
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
...
189
190
»