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Girlfriend Vs. Wife Joke

What is the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?

A Weasel Walked Into A Bar

Did you hear about the weasel that walked into a bar in Minnesota? The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" "Pop" goes the weasel!

Wisdom Comes With Age Joke

As you get older, you'll realize that a $300 watch and a $30 watch both tell the same time. A Micheal Kors wallet and a Forever 21 wallet hold the same amount of money. A $300,000 house and a $100,000 house host the same loneliness. A Ford will drive you as far as a Bentley. True happiness is not found in materialistic things, it comes from the love and laughter found with each other. Stay humble... the holes dug for us in the ground are the same size.

Marraige Or Prison

A woman woke in the middle of the night to find her husband missing from their bed. In the stillness of the house, she could hear a muffled sound downstairs. She went downstairs and looked around, still not finding her husband. Listening again, she could definitely hear moaning. She went down to the basement to find her husband, crouched in the corner facing the wall, sobbing. "What's wrong with you?" she asked him. "Remember when your father caught us together when you were 16?" he replied. "And remember, he said, I had two choices - I could either marry you, or spend the next 20 years in prison." Baffled, she said, "Yes, I remember. So?" "I would have gotten out today."

Trees Poop Joke

How do we know that trees poop?

Condensation In Home Joke

Does anyone know how to stop condensation in my home? Please call, the kettle is always on.

Why Did The Author Put On A Sweater?

Why did the author put on a sweater?

Cat For Christmas Joke

My kids say they want a cat for Christmas. Normally, I do a turkey but hey, if it will make them happy...

Wine Question

Friend, "On average, how much do you spend on a bottle of wine?

Marshmallow Dream Joke

Last night dreamt I was eating giant marshmallows. When I woke up this morning my pillows were gone.

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