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Page 15 of 190
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My Goldfish Died!
Joke:
Little Lori was in the garden filling in a hole when her neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the little girl was up to, he politely asked, "What are you up to there, Lori?" "My goldfish died," replied Lori tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him." The neighbor was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?" Lori patted down the last heap of earth and then replied, "That's because he's inside your stupid cat."
VOTE
Halloween Screwdriver Costume Joke
Joke:
For Halloween I dressed up as a screwdriver... I turned a few heads .
VOTE
Pterodactyl Pun
Joke:
The reason you can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom is because the pee is silent.
VOTE
Killing A Bird
Joke:
You're so stupid, you tried to kill a bird by throwing it off a cliff.
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Nose Pickers
Joke:
My mum told me that picking my nose was disgusting, and from now on, I had to pick it myself.
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Bad Joke
Joke:
Bad jokes are like farts, better to let them pass.
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Skeleton
Joke:
Why don't skeletons trust each other?
Punch Line
VOTE
Birds And Bees Joke
Joke:
I feel bad for parents nowadays. You have to be able to explain the birds and the bees... The bees & the bees... The birds and the birds... The birds that used to be bees... The bees that used to be birds... The birds that look like bees... Plus bees that look like birds but still got a stinger!
VOTE
Self Made Man Joke
Joke:
A man comes to dinner at a new friend's house. While they eat, the new friend's small son keeps staring at the guest. Finally, the guest says, 'Why are you staring at me like that, young fellow?' The kid says, 'Daddy told me you were a self-made man.' The man replies, 'I am'. The kid responds, 'Well, why did you make yourself like that?'
VOTE
Beautifiers
Joke:
A husband and wife are at the grocery store. The husband picks up a case of beer and puts it in the cart. The wife asks, "What are you doing?" He says, "The beer is on sale, 24 cans for $10." She says, "We can't afford that so put it back!" A few isles later the wife puts a $20 tube of face cream in the cart. The husband asks, "What is that for?" The wife says, "It makes my face pretty." The husband replies, "So does 24 cans of beer and it's half the price!"
VOTE
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